The Fighting. I read somewhere that these shows do for women, what wrestling does for men. I can see the correlation, just take the Gorga Baptism episode. Teresa and her brother put on a good, good show. We all know when Teresa walked over to congratulate Joe, that all hell was about to break loose. If I were a man, would I yell at the TV and chant "Teresa, Teresa"? - probably.
The Clothes: The Beverly Hills group favor Louboutins and they will wear them with everything from a cocktail dress to a bikini. These shoes provide for real edge-of your-seat entertainment, especially when Adrienne walks down a flight of stairs. She looks like she will topple over at any moment. Kyle and Taylor sport a lot of resort looks, like white jeans, billowy tops and over sized floppy hats, emoting the feel of the perpetual vacation. And while I openly disdain the tacky RH of NJ, I secretly believe it would be fun to always wear sparkles from head to toe. Sparkles, especially on my work out gear, would inspire me to exercise in the morning and cook pasta at night.
The Gossip: I envy the oodles and oodles of time these gals have to gab just like I did in high school. I need to ask Kyle how she finds the time to raise four kids, including a two year old. How does she grocery shop, potty train, help with homework, clean up toys, and go over to Lisa's house to discuss Brandi's son peeing on the lawn, all within 24 hours?
The Houses (and what's in them). While I'm impressed by Adrienne's indoor spa, I'm way more impressed by her framed wedding dress. Questions that keep me up way past the show are: How does Teresa still live in that big house when she is so broke? How does Melissa live in such a big house when she is so young? Does Villa Blanca really pay the mortgage for Lisa's mini mansion? And doesn't it suck that Camille has to sell her Beaver Creek pad?
There was a brief moment when I considered ditching the RH series. This is when Kyle revealed that there is a make up team behind the camera. She started to say "I was getting my makeup done," and then corrected herself and said, "I was doing my makeup." I gasped, horrified to discover that she didn't do her own makeup before Camille's dinner party. But I chose to move on and watch the rest of the episode. I need my fix.
What's emerging this season, as with every show, is how horrible everyone is. The housewives behavior gets more and more deranged until they can't get anymore disgusting and implode into a ball of smoke. Or rather, until Andy Cohen fires them.
What's also emerging is that my brain cells are disappearing or evaporating. If I continue down this path I will not be able to hold a conversation by spring. I wait for Monday nights, remote in one hand, raw cashews in an other. As a side note, I'm trying to be a vegan and cashews seem like the right snack.Don't you think?